Sometimes I find I can be quite grumpy when I come home with my kids. When my daughter has been using her phone for 1 hour, I can snap at her or when my 8 year old son says “can we play handball?” I can respond with “I am too busy”.
As a dad, we are called to be an inspirational father and inspirational parent that leads with positive energy and not negative energy. As Christians we called to model Christ in who we are.
How do we do that? When we are tired and when the pressures of life seem to take over. We have to cook. We have to clean. We have to do homework. Pressures. Pressures. Pressures.
As parents, we need to nourish ourselves. To find the times in the day that builds us up. To sit with and journal for 10 minutes. To walk the dog. To take a 15-minute power nap. To pray. We must prioritise these moments and not sweep them under the carpet with thoughts like “I am too busy”.
When we have children, everything changes. We stop being so consumed with ourselves and realise that there is someone else that needs cared for. But as our children grow, we too need to be cared for. We can sometimes loose a sense of the care of ourselves. As our children grow, they change physically, but also spiritually. But also, we do too. We need to grow too.
Raising children is one of the most important things we do. As we raise our children, our children model who we are. Do we spend quality time doing things that spiritually feed us? Talking to the homeless. Taking time to stop. Taking time with God. Times for more reflection and deeper thinking. These are qualities we want in our children, so why don’t we model them inside ourselves. Instead, we often communicate with negative talk. We seem to our children to be a brick wall. This image we present is the image they themselves are becoming even though they might think “I will never be like my parents”. We actually are.
We ask God to play a part in who we are. Not just external parts, but more so, internally. We must ask God to transform those parts of our lives which remain hidden. God transform our negative self-talk. God transform our ways of being. We must hand the negative ways of being over to God. We must God to stir us up . We must become “Pascal People” that reflect the “Pascal Mystery”. God who transforms darkness and turns it into light. Where death is made into new life. Sin becomes forgiveness. Where negative energy or negative thinking is made into positive energy and positive thinking. We must become beacons of hope for our children. Not through our energy and time, but in God’s energy and in God’s time.
With a new sense of flexibility and a willingness to listen to our children. Not to judge. We must become the inspirational parents they need so in order that as they grow they too learn how to transform their lives. Firstly, not externally, but internally. The Kingdom of God begins in our hearts. God change our hearts. May we become the instruments of God who seek the light. Especially when things seem hard. Why? Because our children follow who we are becoming.
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