Is it okay to have friends with benefits?

When faced with profound questions, Jesus often replied with queries of His own, nudging inquirers to delve deeper into their souls. This method inspires us to ponder the cultural context that breathes life into our questions.

The Individual at the Center

In Western secular culture, individual desires often eclipse collective wisdom. 'What do I feel?' 'What do I desire?' These introspections, while self-validating, may sometimes lead us away from considering diverse perspectives or the collective experience of humanity.

Waiting for Marriage: An Ancient Wisdom?

Across many cultures and religions, not exclusively Christian, there is a recurring theme encouraging youth to wait for marriage. Could this be an acknowledgment of a deeper significance woven into the very fabric not just many cultures but human design?

The Dynamics of Friends with Benefits

What happens when we consider friends with benefits? We're urged to examine the desires of teenage boys and girls, their emotional and psychological development, and what might be lost in the transaction. What stage of emotional and psychological development are we at? Are we missing something?

The Ripple Effects

Consenting to friends with benefits is not merely a yes-or-no question. It prompts us to consider the psychological, physical, and spiritual consequences of our choices. What consequences do we need to consider?

A Doctor's Cautionary Tale

A doctor and friend who is an atheist in rural Australia, witnesses the repercussions of early sexual activity, like the spread of STDs such as Chlamydia even with protection. Contrary to popular belief, Chlamydia doesn't always lead to infertility, but it can have serious implications. What does the science say?

What Would Jesus Do?

While the Bible doesn't explicitly address modern concepts like friends with benefits, it offers narratives that guide us. Jesus's presence at the wedding at Cana, His transformation of water into wine, and His merciful response to the adulterous woman all serve as meditative touchpoints for our own dilemmas. When are we called to act like Jesus?

Are We Loved? Do We Love?

As we navigate through our desires and relationships, we must consider whether we feel loved, whether we are using others, and who will guide us with compassion, forgiveness, wisdom, and a sense of integral ecology, that everything is connected, as Jesus would.

Who could we talk to who would treat us like Jesus?

With compassion. With forgiveness. With wisdom. With integral ecology.

Sometimes we need to stop. Be in stillness.

Sometimes we need to pray.

Do we pray?

Let us pray…..
    God our loving father be with us at this moment.
    Father….Open our hearts to see your face.
    Father….Open our minds to deepen our understanding.
    Father….Open our hands, lips and feet so we can walk in your ways.
    Sometimes we do not feel loved.
    Sometimes we have great emotions and desires which call us to connect.
    Sometimes we want to take the next step.
    Jesus. Come into our life be our brother and friend.
    Jesus. Be present to us this day.
    Jesus. Call us to ask questions beyond what we can see.
    Spirit…mould into who we are called to be.
    Spirit…may your love flow into our lives like the wedding of cana.
    May we be the water that turns into wine.
    May we be like Jesus not afraid to draw in the sand.
    May the pattern of our lives reflect
    The beauty of creation
    Weave in us your great mystery.
    A love which transcends no bounds.

The Wedding at Cana
On the third day there was a wedding in Cana of Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there. Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding. When the wine gave out, the mother of Jesus said to him, ‘They have no wine.’ And Jesus said to her, ‘Woman, what concern is that to you and to me? My hour has not yet come.’ His mother said to the servants, ‘Do whatever he tells you.’ Now standing there were six stone water-jars for the Jewish rites of purification, each holding twenty or thirty gallons. Jesus said to them, ‘Fill the jars with water.’ And they filled them up to the brim. He said to them, ‘Now draw some out, and take it to the chief steward.’ So they took it. When the steward tasted the water that had become wine, and did not know where it came from (though the servants who had drawn the water knew), the steward called the bridegroom and said to him, ‘Everyone serves the good wine first, and then the inferior wine after the guests have become drunk. But you have kept the good wine until now.’ Jesus did this, the first of his signs, in Cana of Galilee, and revealed his glory; and his disciples believed in him.

Let us continue the conversation with openness and sincerity, remembering that the patterns of our lives should reflect the beauty of creation.

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30 November 2023

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